To my sweetest boy on his third birthday:

Dear Lively,

You are 3 today! 

What a year we have had. I had hoped to chronicle it more thoroughly throughout the year, but we, as a family, are worn out. Instead, I will summarize your year here and now.

You started school! You started at the same preschool Annie attends in September. Here you both are on the first day of school.

I am amazed at how much smaller you both look; when I remember this day, it seems like it could have been last week. For the first month, Daddy and I were worried sick when we picked you up and found you right where we had left you, sitting by the front door of the classroom and twirling the propeller on the toy plane. But then you made friends! Your class is full of sweet little 2-year-olds who love you, and I think that you have learned a lot from them about how to play, how to communicate, how to be part of a group. Things aren't easy for you, and I know this, and it breaks my heart each time I understand it a little more. But you are happy there, and I am happy for you.

You continued with unbelievable amounts of therapy and interventions throughout the year. These included:

• Early On, 2 times per week
• An intervention study through University of Michigan, once per week through December, and 3-4 times per week beginning in January
• Occupational therapy, intermittent
• Speech therapy, once per week
• Intensive Feeding Program, daily, for the last 7 weeks, with 1 week to go

The accumulation of all of these appointments (as well as Annie's new diabetes and all that entails) is what has made our family so tired. But I will save those stories for another day.

Things you love:

1. Elmo. You have loved Elmo for a long time, as did your sister before you. I can't really remember how it all started, but I suspect it was with an episode of Elmo's World. You dressed as Elmo for Halloween (Annie's old costume), and at this point, you require Elmo's World to nap at home or to go to sleep at night. Because you are still at the feeding program in Grand Rapids, Daddy and I often have to use Elmo to occupy you so that we can have a meeting with one of your providers, or make a phone call, or go to the bathroom. So you are addicted to Elmo. I suppose there could be worse things. 

2. Signing Times. This is the only other show you really watch, and I continue to be impressed with how many signs you know. You also love the songs and watching Rachel teach the signs, and I think it's great.

3. Car race, aka Cars, the movie. This is a fairly new development, since starting the program in Grand Rapids. You could watch both Cars and Cars 2 multiple times a day. We gave you a "car race" racetrack for you birthday today, and it was a big hit with you and Annie both. 

4. Annie. 

You love Annie so much you don't quite know what to do. Sometimes you are so excited to see her that it overwhelms you and you sort of lash out and hit her. (She does not appreciate this.) You kiss her and say "sorry Annie" when she is sad, even if you did the thing that has made her sad. You want to be with her and play with her all the time, but often you express this by running through whatever she is playing with and knocking it down, or destroying something she is drawing. You miss her when you are away from her, and you are delighted to see her when you are reunited. (She is delighted to see you too, although sometimes she tries to hide it.) You share a room with Annie, and you won't fall asleep until you can see her in her bed. 

5. Your bike. We gave you a bike for your second birthday, which you have completely outgrown but won't let go. You have a bigger bike we are trying to encourage you to adopt, and although you like it, you LOVE your first bike, despite the fact that your knees almost drag the ground when you ride it. I suspect that when you switch to the big boy bike, you will fall equally as in love with it.

6. Daddy. Daddy has been your parent of choice for about the last year. You started having a lot of one-on-one time with Daddy last summer because his work schedule allowed him to be with you for the majority of your appointments through the research study at U of M. I feel sad knowing that my job responsibilities have taken me away from you, and from Annie and Daddy too. 

7. The park. You love to slide! To swing! To climb! To jump off tall things and land in the grass! And every single time I see you do these things, I remember that there was a time that we didn't know if you would ever be able to walk. 

8. Lion. Lion is a new friend -- you appropriated him from Annie's no-longer-wanted toys. You and Lion have been inseparable since we've been in Grand Rapids.

9. Screaming! You have an ear-piercing scream that you use mostly to express joy and excitement, and occasionally frustration and fear. Usually I hear this sound and know that you are happy. But this scream, if released in public, draws angry and judgmental looks from people in the vicinity, and sometimes rude and hurtful comments. I love your unbridled joy. I am disgusted at how intolerant others are of it. 

You have been so busy this last year, and you have learned so much. I desperately want the world to be an easier place for you, but so far you are living in it happily. May you continue to be so happy my darling boy. It is what I want the most for you, for Annie, for all of us.

I love you with my whole heart,

Mama